the wily and weird ways of maggie the dog

Sorry that some of the pictures are poor quality, but the pup hates to have her picture taken. 

She isn't allowed on the couch, but she likes to "sit" on it. The rule of the house 

is she can sit on the couch as long as three feet are on the ground.

She thinks she's a 70lb lap dog...well, actually, I suppose one could argue she "is" a 70lb lap dog.

While sitting on the couch, she likes to rest her head on pretty much any object nearby.

I have no idea what's going on here.